There is really nothing too secretive about what funeral directors do. Most people only want to know the secrets of what we see in the embalming room. They really aren’t interested in the funeral—it’s the body that holds more intrigue. So it was with much interest that I read the article by Readers’ Digest that enumerated 13 things funeral directors don’t disclose. I was expecting the secrets of what we do in the embalming room not necessarily what we say and do during the arrangement conference since it is hardly a secret, thanks to the Federal Trade Commission (FTC.)
We covered most of these topics in our recent book, Grave Reflections, but the attitude of the general public that intrigues me the most is that this is another article on how to “save” money. Eleven of the thirteen statements are directed at cost and yet never are the benefits of a funeral disclosed. The FTC mandates how we disclose our services almost verbatim so embalming, service prices, and casket prices (including the least expensive) are not secrets we can keep (there are steep fines for non-disclosure) nor do we want to as we appreciate it when we are arranging with an informed consumer.
We know so many ethical funeral directors so it is an insult to imply that these are secrets funeral directors keep when it is probably more the minority. However, we are used to the increased scrutiny. Many of our critics blame the immediate need for expensive decisions on funeral directors yet there is never a good time to plan a funeral. And by the way, planning in advance might not save you money but it will surely buy you the satisfaction that you purchased exactly what you wanted without the immediate pressure.
You will also find another article from the same author that details 9 more secrets. These are not really secrets but merely facts that will cause you to become a more informed consumer when the time comes to arrange a funeral. The funeral industry does not want to keep any secrets so visit a funeral home when you are not shopping for a funeral. Take a list of questions, if you must, and go down the line until all your answers are satisfactory. We realize that entering our doors is not on the top of everyone’s list but it will usually get you a hot cup of coffee or a cold water bottle and a conversation that is long overdue.
